So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize