I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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