How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
