sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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