How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
