You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
