im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
he fucked my hip out of place.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize