Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I touched a dick in church today
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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