it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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