that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
