I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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