Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize