Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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