all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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