Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
