Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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