white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
