I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
