im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
