was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
