K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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