4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
