fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
