Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
