And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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