i may or may not be watching the land before time
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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