so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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