In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
