this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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