she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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