im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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