Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
