If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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