Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
