i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
You were trust falling into bushes
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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