we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize