It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize
