I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
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