Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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