Reggie can tackle my bush.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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