also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
