I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
do nipples grow back?
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