oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize