I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
