Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
