I want to have your abortion
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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