i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
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