Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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