I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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