Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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