I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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